Deciding to Leave a Marriage

Couple sitting at table with divorce papers and rings

It probably comes as no surprise that individuals who ultimately decide to divorce had their first thought about that possibility more than two years before it actually happens! But even with early signs, the decision to dissolve a marriage is a very tough one.

Why do we wait so long? Why do we sacrifice so much? Well, I’m not a psychologist (I’m a CDFA, Certified Divorce Financial Analyst®) but goodness knows I’ve spent my fair share of time studying the ins and outs of divorce. Having just about seen it all, I can share what I know for sure –

  • When people say “for better or worse” most actually mean it! They go in committed to work through anything. But sacrificing self sometimes is not healthy.
  • If your marriage is really hard work, you’re married to the wrong person.
  • If you don’t like the person you are most days, you’re with the wrong person.
  • If you feel bullied, controlled, ignored, or completely misunderstood, you’re with the wrong person.
  • If you’re staying together for the kids, you’re hurting your kids, not helping them.
  • Kids need to see a model of a healthy love relationship or they will not know how to have one.
  • The right relationship is nearly effortless…mostly.
  • The right mate inspires you and you want to become a better person just for them because you feel so lucky.
  • Chances are if you are reading this, you probably see yourself in one or more of the scenarios above.

Food for thought.

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This article was submitted by Donald Morris CDFA and financial advisor. Donald is currently serving as president of